August 31, 2010
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
From the end of the earth I will cry to You,
When my heart is overwhelmed;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 61:2
Yes, I know that I have been blogging an awful lot of late. This comes from an abundance of free time and much on my mind. When I took Strengthfinders, my third strength was Input, which rather made me scoff. Yes, I collect information about people all day long, but should Input end up third? Now that I am unemployed yet again and rather at loose ends, I have been reading up on aid blogs. Input strikes again! This blog somewhat serves as an outlet for all that is processing and growing in me.
It is a strength to learn about these justice causes not only for my own education but also so that I can share with others. This is essentially what I want to do for my career. Yet, I do become overwhelmed with the level of tragedy and suffering in the world and my obvious impotence. This is such a part of my life that I have been slow to realize that thinking about universal suffering on a daily basis is not the norm. I struggle with wanting creature comforts (heat, haircut, clothes, plumbing, cleanliness, etc.) when so many people have only the shirts on their backs. Yet, I want to improve people's qualities of lives, not necessarily chastise those of us for whom electricity is the norm. I don't think it's wrong to want clean sheets and oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. What is wrong is to prioritize a lifestyle over Christ.
The subject of suffering has been even more on my mind this past month, with the perspective that God wants to use it for sanctification. I was chatting about this with Nick last night, and he reminded me, yes, but what is the end goal of sanctification? It is communion with our perfect, loving, omnipotent, heavenly Father. I must add this part to my sanctification speech! This is our hope and joy.
And so as people I dearly love fail me, as I still choose to be vulnerable, as my heart cries for the women in the Congo, as I am painfully learning patience and trust, as I am physically and emotionally weary, in short, as I am overwhelmed (and today is all of those things) -- I must return to Christ. He is higher and greater than my emotions and thoughts, my successes and failures, my hopes and dreams. I am a broken person, and that is a good place to be, broken before the Lord.
Thanks for your time!
When my heart is overwhelmed;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 61:2
Yes, I know that I have been blogging an awful lot of late. This comes from an abundance of free time and much on my mind. When I took Strengthfinders, my third strength was Input, which rather made me scoff. Yes, I collect information about people all day long, but should Input end up third? Now that I am unemployed yet again and rather at loose ends, I have been reading up on aid blogs. Input strikes again! This blog somewhat serves as an outlet for all that is processing and growing in me.
It is a strength to learn about these justice causes not only for my own education but also so that I can share with others. This is essentially what I want to do for my career. Yet, I do become overwhelmed with the level of tragedy and suffering in the world and my obvious impotence. This is such a part of my life that I have been slow to realize that thinking about universal suffering on a daily basis is not the norm. I struggle with wanting creature comforts (heat, haircut, clothes, plumbing, cleanliness, etc.) when so many people have only the shirts on their backs. Yet, I want to improve people's qualities of lives, not necessarily chastise those of us for whom electricity is the norm. I don't think it's wrong to want clean sheets and oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. What is wrong is to prioritize a lifestyle over Christ.
The subject of suffering has been even more on my mind this past month, with the perspective that God wants to use it for sanctification. I was chatting about this with Nick last night, and he reminded me, yes, but what is the end goal of sanctification? It is communion with our perfect, loving, omnipotent, heavenly Father. I must add this part to my sanctification speech! This is our hope and joy.
And so as people I dearly love fail me, as I still choose to be vulnerable, as my heart cries for the women in the Congo, as I am painfully learning patience and trust, as I am physically and emotionally weary, in short, as I am overwhelmed (and today is all of those things) -- I must return to Christ. He is higher and greater than my emotions and thoughts, my successes and failures, my hopes and dreams. I am a broken person, and that is a good place to be, broken before the Lord.
Thanks for your time!
Art
For something totally cool that you've never seen before, Google Image search "Dalton Ghetti" or click here for a blog post about him. Thanks to Myles of Style for finding this.
Five Languages of Apology
I often discuss the five love languages, but not so often the five languages of apology: regret, responsibility, restitution, repentance, and requesting forgiveness. Check them out here. You can also take a twenty-question quiz if you do not recognize yours from reading the descriptions. Mine are regret and responsibility, depending on the situation.
August 29, 2010
"Oh, we've got trouble!"
Opened up to this section of The Renewed Mind today when taking a break from cleaning the church.
...the Holy Spirit brings into action a very special too called Trouble. This is a tool which God has designed to get down into the depths of our being. It is designed to fulfill a twofold function: it has a cutting edge and an etching point. The cutting edge of trouble exposes our weaknesses. The etching point inscribes upon the picture of God's strength. Trouble exposes our weakness so that we can learn to draw upon God's strength. That is the particular job the tool of trouble does for each of us as it is used by the Holy Spirit.
First of all, the Holy Spirit uses trouble to expose our weakness. This weakness falls into two basic categories: The weakness of our circumstances--those things outside of us we depend on; and the weakness of our character--those things inside of us we depend on.
The cutting edge of trouble exposes the weakness of our circumstances. Economic circumstances, for instance, can wield great influence upon our lives. The Bible illustrates this in the parable of the Rich Fool. In your own life, without any warning, you can have hundreds of dollars of unexpected expenses; inflation can eat away your savings. You discover just how dependent you are on material things. The Holy Spirit may use economic trouble to expose those things in our lives which are not essentially related to Jesus. Calamities come to show the weakness of our social environment--from a little thing like a freeway tie-up, to a major thing like war. Overnight a stable situation can crumble. God allows it to happen. He allows the cutting edge of trouble to knife into our undue dependency upon our surroundings. We may thing that we have stable relationships in regard to our standing with other people. But God will cut into that with the sharp edge of trouble. Jesus Himself found this aspect of His life put to the test. He came into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday. The crowd shouted, "Hosanna to the Son of David!" Five days later the crowd's enthusiasm evaporated. God put it to the test. If Jesus had been depending on the support of the crowd, He would have been thoroughly discouraged. The first thing that trouble does is to show us how helpless and needy we really are.
God also wants us to recognize the weaknesses in our own character. We tend to depend upon certain characteristics within ourselves to bring us through difficult situations. [Example of Peter saying he would never deny Jesus.] In our relationships with other people we have to learn not to depend on the merits of our own character. Have you been disappointed or even shocked by the impatience, the hatred, the resentment that suddenly bursts out of you under extreme testing in a situation? You say, "Oh! I didn't know that was in me!" But God knew it was in you. So He took the sharp knife of trouble and exposed that weakness, sot hat you could recognize your need for a strength beyond yourself. Soren Kierkegaard, the 19th century Danish theologian and philosopher, tells a story that marked him all his life. He saw a man whose relationship with God apparently stood in good order. And yet, when his young son died, this man stood by the graveside and shook his fist toward heaven crying, "Is this the way You treat me after all I've done for You?" Suddenly the weakness of his character stood nakedly exposed. His relationship to God was not a relationship of love and trust, but one of duty and keeping the rulers, and being paid for what you do. Not the mentality of a son, but of a slave. The sharp knife of trouble exposed his weakness.
Perhaps you are in the midst of trouble even as you read this. What does God want you to do when you come into trouble? Trouble knifes you open and you see the weakness in your life. The things outside you collapse. The things inside you crumble. What are you to do? That's where the second function of the tool of trouble comes into play. On this raw, exposed part of our life, God begins to etch a picture and a promise of the strength and the resources of God. Consider two questions at this point: When the Holy Spirit wields His tool of trouble upon your life, does it make you bitter or does it make you better? Do you cry out for deliverance of for development?
The words "bitter" and "better" are very similar. Just one letter makes the difference, the I. And that is the key. If you focus upon the I in your situation of trouble, you will become bitter and hard. If you look at your own misery and begin to wallow around in self-pity, bitterness will overcome you. Let's not kid ourselves about trouble. There's nothing magic about it. Trouble is morally neutral. [More about choosing not to become bitter and try to use your own strength. Example of Paul, who focuses on God during trouble. 2 Corinthians 11:19-12:10.]
As you look to God, the heavens open up. God begins to show you how you can draw upon the resources of heaven to fill up this emptiness and weakness that has been exposed in your own life. God never exposes weakness to shame us, to make use feel helpless and frightened. He only wants to tell us, "I never meant for you to live a life independent of Me. I created you a dependent being. If you are not depending on Me, you are going to be depending upon some false god." The human creature was created for dependency--utter, complete dependency. When God exposes our weakness, it is only to bring us back to the bed-rock, so that we can build our life on the right foundation.
When the Holy Spirit wields the tool of trouble in your life, do you look for deliverance, or do you look for development? If you continually refuse to meet trouble head-on, you miss the Holy Spirit's purpose. You've been cut open, your weakness is exposed, but then you tuck yourself together and dodge away from the trouble. All you've had is a painful experience and nothing has been gained by it. This is our human tendency. We cry out, "Lord, deliver me! What can I do to get out of this situation?" If we listen, the voice of God will say, "I don't intend for you to get out of it. I intend for you to go through it. The purpose for which this trouble has come is not that you be delivered, but that you be developed--that you become more like Jesus as you go through this experience."
Katie here again. I love how God often directs me exactly to the thing He wants me to read. Honestly, I don't think this book is terribly well written. However, this passage reiterates a subject I have been pondering and discussing. I think I mentioned on this blog that we often forget that God's purpose for us is sanctification. The last few sentences of that passage did sum this up well. Although I do think there are occasions when God will indeed deliver us from our woes, often we forget that He is molding us to the image of His Son. We're focused on smaller goals: jobs, relationships, financial security, ministry, etc. Yet, all those are just parts of God's main intention.
Occasionally I am concerned that by posting on these topics, I shall give the impression that I have "arrived" spiritually. Friends, I have so far to go! I mess up multiple times a day. Yes, I have the privilege of sharing an intimate and profound relationship with the Supreme Being. He has grown me tremendously and graciously given me much insight. Yet, I greatly resonate with the words of Paul in one of my favorite passages of Scripture:
12 Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3
...the Holy Spirit brings into action a very special too called Trouble. This is a tool which God has designed to get down into the depths of our being. It is designed to fulfill a twofold function: it has a cutting edge and an etching point. The cutting edge of trouble exposes our weaknesses. The etching point inscribes upon the picture of God's strength. Trouble exposes our weakness so that we can learn to draw upon God's strength. That is the particular job the tool of trouble does for each of us as it is used by the Holy Spirit.
First of all, the Holy Spirit uses trouble to expose our weakness. This weakness falls into two basic categories: The weakness of our circumstances--those things outside of us we depend on; and the weakness of our character--those things inside of us we depend on.
The cutting edge of trouble exposes the weakness of our circumstances. Economic circumstances, for instance, can wield great influence upon our lives. The Bible illustrates this in the parable of the Rich Fool. In your own life, without any warning, you can have hundreds of dollars of unexpected expenses; inflation can eat away your savings. You discover just how dependent you are on material things. The Holy Spirit may use economic trouble to expose those things in our lives which are not essentially related to Jesus. Calamities come to show the weakness of our social environment--from a little thing like a freeway tie-up, to a major thing like war. Overnight a stable situation can crumble. God allows it to happen. He allows the cutting edge of trouble to knife into our undue dependency upon our surroundings. We may thing that we have stable relationships in regard to our standing with other people. But God will cut into that with the sharp edge of trouble. Jesus Himself found this aspect of His life put to the test. He came into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday. The crowd shouted, "Hosanna to the Son of David!" Five days later the crowd's enthusiasm evaporated. God put it to the test. If Jesus had been depending on the support of the crowd, He would have been thoroughly discouraged. The first thing that trouble does is to show us how helpless and needy we really are.
God also wants us to recognize the weaknesses in our own character. We tend to depend upon certain characteristics within ourselves to bring us through difficult situations. [Example of Peter saying he would never deny Jesus.] In our relationships with other people we have to learn not to depend on the merits of our own character. Have you been disappointed or even shocked by the impatience, the hatred, the resentment that suddenly bursts out of you under extreme testing in a situation? You say, "Oh! I didn't know that was in me!" But God knew it was in you. So He took the sharp knife of trouble and exposed that weakness, sot hat you could recognize your need for a strength beyond yourself. Soren Kierkegaard, the 19th century Danish theologian and philosopher, tells a story that marked him all his life. He saw a man whose relationship with God apparently stood in good order. And yet, when his young son died, this man stood by the graveside and shook his fist toward heaven crying, "Is this the way You treat me after all I've done for You?" Suddenly the weakness of his character stood nakedly exposed. His relationship to God was not a relationship of love and trust, but one of duty and keeping the rulers, and being paid for what you do. Not the mentality of a son, but of a slave. The sharp knife of trouble exposed his weakness.
Perhaps you are in the midst of trouble even as you read this. What does God want you to do when you come into trouble? Trouble knifes you open and you see the weakness in your life. The things outside you collapse. The things inside you crumble. What are you to do? That's where the second function of the tool of trouble comes into play. On this raw, exposed part of our life, God begins to etch a picture and a promise of the strength and the resources of God. Consider two questions at this point: When the Holy Spirit wields His tool of trouble upon your life, does it make you bitter or does it make you better? Do you cry out for deliverance of for development?
The words "bitter" and "better" are very similar. Just one letter makes the difference, the I. And that is the key. If you focus upon the I in your situation of trouble, you will become bitter and hard. If you look at your own misery and begin to wallow around in self-pity, bitterness will overcome you. Let's not kid ourselves about trouble. There's nothing magic about it. Trouble is morally neutral. [More about choosing not to become bitter and try to use your own strength. Example of Paul, who focuses on God during trouble. 2 Corinthians 11:19-12:10.]
As you look to God, the heavens open up. God begins to show you how you can draw upon the resources of heaven to fill up this emptiness and weakness that has been exposed in your own life. God never exposes weakness to shame us, to make use feel helpless and frightened. He only wants to tell us, "I never meant for you to live a life independent of Me. I created you a dependent being. If you are not depending on Me, you are going to be depending upon some false god." The human creature was created for dependency--utter, complete dependency. When God exposes our weakness, it is only to bring us back to the bed-rock, so that we can build our life on the right foundation.
When the Holy Spirit wields the tool of trouble in your life, do you look for deliverance, or do you look for development? If you continually refuse to meet trouble head-on, you miss the Holy Spirit's purpose. You've been cut open, your weakness is exposed, but then you tuck yourself together and dodge away from the trouble. All you've had is a painful experience and nothing has been gained by it. This is our human tendency. We cry out, "Lord, deliver me! What can I do to get out of this situation?" If we listen, the voice of God will say, "I don't intend for you to get out of it. I intend for you to go through it. The purpose for which this trouble has come is not that you be delivered, but that you be developed--that you become more like Jesus as you go through this experience."
Katie here again. I love how God often directs me exactly to the thing He wants me to read. Honestly, I don't think this book is terribly well written. However, this passage reiterates a subject I have been pondering and discussing. I think I mentioned on this blog that we often forget that God's purpose for us is sanctification. The last few sentences of that passage did sum this up well. Although I do think there are occasions when God will indeed deliver us from our woes, often we forget that He is molding us to the image of His Son. We're focused on smaller goals: jobs, relationships, financial security, ministry, etc. Yet, all those are just parts of God's main intention.
Occasionally I am concerned that by posting on these topics, I shall give the impression that I have "arrived" spiritually. Friends, I have so far to go! I mess up multiple times a day. Yes, I have the privilege of sharing an intimate and profound relationship with the Supreme Being. He has grown me tremendously and graciously given me much insight. Yet, I greatly resonate with the words of Paul in one of my favorite passages of Scripture:
12 Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3
August 26, 2010
What am I doing with my free time?
Letting go.
Merging, sorting, discarding belongings.
Cogitating.
Job searching.
Reading aid blogs.
Praying.
Visiting friends.
Studying for a potential part-time gig as an SAT-prep teacher.
Taking things a beat slower because of low-quality sleep.
Merging, sorting, discarding belongings.
Cogitating.
Job searching.
Reading aid blogs.
Praying.
Visiting friends.
Studying for a potential part-time gig as an SAT-prep teacher.
Taking things a beat slower because of low-quality sleep.
August 25, 2010
US Recovery Act
Go here for a small blurb on how the federal government is spending stimulus money. Personally, I'd prefer $300,000.
7Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
8They collapse and fall,
but we rise and stand upright.
Psalm 20:7
7Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
8They collapse and fall,
but we rise and stand upright.
Psalm 20:7
August 24, 2010
In Me
My favorite part:
How refreshing to know You don't need me
How amazing to find that You want me
So I'll stand on Your Truth, and I'll fight with Your Strength
Until You bring the victory, by the power of Christ in me
August 23, 2010
Letters
Moving home has accelerated my habit of clearing through my things. My latest project is sorting through shoeboxes of cards and letters. I do this about every other year. This afternoon as I was sorting, I wandered off and starting thinking on a subject that has been a trial for some weeks. Doubt and sadness started to cloud my thinking. With the premise that busyness would be an antidote, I returned to sorting, and the first card I picked up was a birthday card from 2002 in which an elderly lady who used to attend our church had written:
Stir up the gift of God that is in you --
For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. ...not according to our works but according to His own purpose and grace --
Hold fast His sound words in faith and love which is in Christ Jesus.
That good thing which was committed unto you keep by the Holy Spirit which dwells in us.
2 Tim. 1:6,7,9,13 and 14
Grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 3:18
(Not only a head knowledge...but a heart knowledge, through direct experience. Joni Erickson Tada)
This is what I needed to read to change my mindset. God is so faithful! I am humbled when He answers my prayers to remind me of truth and encourage me in what He is saying.
Also, I found these two gems amongst many delightful missives. In addition to being complimentary, I enjoy how they demonstrate my siblings' personalities. They were received my first quarter away at Cal Poly.
K iding is fun w/her, yet sometimes she's...
A stonishing in her strange ways
T hough she can be very nice and
I nteresting to talk to! :-) She is
E xuberant!
Beth, age 13 (9/2005)
K ind and thoughtful girl
A loving and enjoyable friend
T enacious like her brother
I ncredible student and straight A whiz
E xcelling among the best of the best
Jeremy, age 10 (11/2005)
Jeremy's letter continues:
Dear Katie,
I love you and am sorry I haven't written you because, for real!, I've been actually busy! I can't write that well because I lost some of my fingernail, but will not go into that. I'm starting basketball in December and hope to play baseball later. Taking care of Shrimp has been fun. I need to buy her some turkey! Mom brought home my report card and I go straight A's. Except one A- in work study habits for talking. I was tenacious to Mom and said I have to help people and talk to them. You wouldn't believe the cries for help! "Jeremy, get over here," every second, espescially a girl named Kathryn, close to your name. Alan and I hang out a lot, however I'm starting to play with the younger class a lot! Ooops! That was horrible, two a lots! Anyway, I'm emerging as a leader at Santa Clara and am humbling myself at home. I hope you are doing well! The funniest thing happened today, I dropped all the spaghetti trash from school and Alan and I had to pick it up. I will go into further details later. After recess, when all of the younger class is lined up, some boys and girls all do different secret handshakes with me. Life is good!
Love,
=-) Jeremy =-)
P.S. Have you seen the new Brain Jacquest book High Rhulain? Karen lent it to me for awhile!
Stir up the gift of God that is in you --
For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. ...not according to our works but according to His own purpose and grace --
Hold fast His sound words in faith and love which is in Christ Jesus.
That good thing which was committed unto you keep by the Holy Spirit which dwells in us.
2 Tim. 1:6,7,9,13 and 14
Grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 3:18
(Not only a head knowledge...but a heart knowledge, through direct experience. Joni Erickson Tada)
This is what I needed to read to change my mindset. God is so faithful! I am humbled when He answers my prayers to remind me of truth and encourage me in what He is saying.
Also, I found these two gems amongst many delightful missives. In addition to being complimentary, I enjoy how they demonstrate my siblings' personalities. They were received my first quarter away at Cal Poly.
K iding is fun w/her, yet sometimes she's...
A stonishing in her strange ways
T hough she can be very nice and
I nteresting to talk to! :-) She is
E xuberant!
Beth, age 13 (9/2005)
K ind and thoughtful girl
A loving and enjoyable friend
T enacious like her brother
I ncredible student and straight A whiz
E xcelling among the best of the best
Jeremy, age 10 (11/2005)
Jeremy's letter continues:
Dear Katie,
I love you and am sorry I haven't written you because, for real!, I've been actually busy! I can't write that well because I lost some of my fingernail, but will not go into that. I'm starting basketball in December and hope to play baseball later. Taking care of Shrimp has been fun. I need to buy her some turkey! Mom brought home my report card and I go straight A's. Except one A- in work study habits for talking. I was tenacious to Mom and said I have to help people and talk to them. You wouldn't believe the cries for help! "Jeremy, get over here," every second, espescially a girl named Kathryn, close to your name. Alan and I hang out a lot, however I'm starting to play with the younger class a lot! Ooops! That was horrible, two a lots! Anyway, I'm emerging as a leader at Santa Clara and am humbling myself at home. I hope you are doing well! The funniest thing happened today, I dropped all the spaghetti trash from school and Alan and I had to pick it up. I will go into further details later. After recess, when all of the younger class is lined up, some boys and girls all do different secret handshakes with me. Life is good!
Love,
=-) Jeremy =-)
P.S. Have you seen the new Brain Jacquest book High Rhulain? Karen lent it to me for awhile!
August 22, 2010
Today's Encouragement
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then You knew my path. * He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold. * Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations. * You have been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat.
Who is a rock, except our God? * They shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. * Uphold me according to Your word, that I may live; and do not let me be ashamed of my hope. * This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil.
Ps. 61:2; Phil. 4:6-7; Ps. 142:3; Job 23:10; Ps. 90:1; Isa. 25:4; Ps. 18:31; John 10:28; Ps. 119:116; Heb. 6:19
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then You knew my path. * He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold. * Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations. * You have been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat.
Who is a rock, except our God? * They shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. * Uphold me according to Your word, that I may live; and do not let me be ashamed of my hope. * This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil.
Ps. 61:2; Phil. 4:6-7; Ps. 142:3; Job 23:10; Ps. 90:1; Isa. 25:4; Ps. 18:31; John 10:28; Ps. 119:116; Heb. 6:19
August 20, 2010
Verse wallpaper
I made a wallpaper! I often want to put verses up as my wallpaper but can't find anything aesthetically pleasing in my Google searches. Actually, the enlarged quality of this image is rather lacking, but I am impressed with myself that I managed to find a picture, type the verse, group it in Publisher, and save it as a picture in a short amount of time. Lest I sound too self-congratulatory, I pretty much have no idea what I'm doing. I wish I could figure out how to crop the picture to be the same dimensions as the screen (i.e. I know how to crop, but what are the dimensions?). That is for another day. Cheers.
August 19, 2010
Women in Global Development
Tonight I remembered how much I enjoy using my brain in learning. I've spent a few hours reading up on individuals involved in foreign policy, social entrepreneurship, and/or social justice. I admire the two women who spoke in the TED talks I've just posted.
The first, Sheryl WuDunn is the co-author of Half the Sky. She and her husband, Nicholas Kristoff, were the first couple to receive a Pulitzer prize for journalism for a previous book about the Tienanmen Square protests in 1989. She was a banker, then a journalist, and is currently a business executive and lecturer. I believe that she has two children. Her husband is a journalist for The New York Times.
Jacqueline Novogratz also comes from a banking background and has extensive experience in that arena, including being a consultant for the World Bank. In addition to other nonprofit ventures, she founded the Acumen Fund which "uses entrepreneurial approaches to solve the problems of global poverty." Jacqueline is currently the CEO of the Acumen Fund and also speaks. Oh yes, she also wrote a book chronicling her journey from banking to social entrepreneurship. She is married to the host of TED and has three daughters.
As you can see from the videos, both women are lovely and well-spoken. They've also both kept their last names. Although I admire how both couples seem to work well together, I find myself wondering how their families manage to balance two flourishing careers with children.
When I read about people like this, particularly women, I feel that I should be much more accomplished. Yet, relationships are more important to me than work. Sometimes I am concerned that if I ever am finally able to work full time in relief and development work, I will feel guilty for not working, say, 60 hours a week. Sometimes I think I should be working 60 hours a week as I genuinely believe that my life is not about me. Pop told me last week that I always think of hypotheticals. That quality has been a weakness this past year, but I think it's a strength too.
The first, Sheryl WuDunn is the co-author of Half the Sky. She and her husband, Nicholas Kristoff, were the first couple to receive a Pulitzer prize for journalism for a previous book about the Tienanmen Square protests in 1989. She was a banker, then a journalist, and is currently a business executive and lecturer. I believe that she has two children. Her husband is a journalist for The New York Times.
Jacqueline Novogratz also comes from a banking background and has extensive experience in that arena, including being a consultant for the World Bank. In addition to other nonprofit ventures, she founded the Acumen Fund which "uses entrepreneurial approaches to solve the problems of global poverty." Jacqueline is currently the CEO of the Acumen Fund and also speaks. Oh yes, she also wrote a book chronicling her journey from banking to social entrepreneurship. She is married to the host of TED and has three daughters.
As you can see from the videos, both women are lovely and well-spoken. They've also both kept their last names. Although I admire how both couples seem to work well together, I find myself wondering how their families manage to balance two flourishing careers with children.
When I read about people like this, particularly women, I feel that I should be much more accomplished. Yet, relationships are more important to me than work. Sometimes I am concerned that if I ever am finally able to work full time in relief and development work, I will feel guilty for not working, say, 60 hours a week. Sometimes I think I should be working 60 hours a week as I genuinely believe that my life is not about me. Pop told me last week that I always think of hypotheticals. That quality has been a weakness this past year, but I think it's a strength too.
August 18, 2010
Billionaires
I thought this was an interesting news item about Bill Gates and Warren Buffet challenging other billionaires to give away half their fortunes. As an aside, I find it amazing that the richest man in the world is still married to his wife. Some people are skeptical that he is faithful, and I am obviously not in a position to know. However, most rich celebrities seem to have trouble staying married, so I find their continued union commendable.
August 17, 2010
Brokenness
Friends, God is teaching me much through brokenness. In Matthew 21 (and Luke 20), Jesus warns the Pharisees:
42Jesus said to them, "Have you never read in the Scriptures:
"'The stone that the builders rejected
has become the cornerstone;
this was the Lord’s doing,
and it is marvelous in our eyes'?
42Jesus said to them, "Have you never read in the Scriptures:
"'The stone that the builders rejected
has become the cornerstone;
this was the Lord’s doing,
and it is marvelous in our eyes'?
43Therefore I tell you, the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a people producing its fruits. 44And the one who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces; and when it falls on anyone, it will crush him."
My friend and I were talking about this verse the other day. It is much better to come, fall on Jesus, and have yourself broken so that He can mend you, rather than to deny Him and eventually find yourself crushed. Some versions say when the stone falls, it will "grind them to powder." Ouch. Jesus is speaking about salvation, but this metaphor also applies to the daily brokenness of giving up what we want (letting it fall to pieces) in exchange for what God wants. One friend talks about "coming to the end of our own strength." Do we go to God first, or do we wait until we come to the end of our own strength? I've begun praying that if I'm being pigheaded, that God will step in long before I reach the end of my own strength. I don't even want to approach that point, but the sad reality is that I often unconsciously tell God, "I can handle it! I've got this one, God. I know you're busy, and so am I. I can do this." Foolish! When you're broken, either by surrender or circumstance, you don't attempt to act on your own. As Pop likes to say, you pray one of those profound prayers, "Help, God!"
I'm commencing a study on brokenness via www.blueletterbible.com, and I was surprised to discover Ezekial 6:9 that speaks of God's heart being "broken" or "crushed" over Israel's "whoring heart that has departed from me and over their eyes that go whoring after their idols." The word is defined thus:
a) (Qal)
1) break, break in or down, rend violently, wreck, crush, quench
2) to break, rupture (fig)
b) (Niphal)
1) to be broken, be maimed, be crippled, be wrecked
2) to be broken, be crushed (fig)
c) (Piel) to shatter, break
d) (Hiphil) to cause to break out, bring to the birth
e) (Hophal) to be broken, be shattered
It is generally a violent word, used metaphorically and literally of broken bones, idols, bars, people, etc. It is the same word used of broken hearts as well. For instance, Psalms 34:18 "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart and saves such as a have a contrite spirit." And Psalms 51:17 "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, A broken and a contrite heart— These, O God, You will not despise." And again, Isaiah 61:1 "The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me, Because the LORD has anointed Me To preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives, And the opening of the prison to those who are bound..." Jesus made it a point to read that last passage in the Temple and indeed did fulfill it.
It amazes me that God would deign to have His heart broken over His people. Seriously. Stop and think about it. We suffer broken hearts and broken spirits. God's love for us is so great that He is willing to suffer in this regard as well. He wants us! Bob Pierce looked out on a world filled with physical and spiritual suffering and prayed, "Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God." That is a dangerous prayer in the best sense because you will indeed be broken. So far what I've learned from this study about God's brokenness is that it is over His people being unfaithful.
The other thing that amazes me is that one of the reasons God sent Jesus was to "heal the brokenhearted." We often ask some version of, "God, do you care? Do you see? Am I just living in a soap opera down here? I feel a little ridiculous feeling miserable when I'm not sure what You think about it." Okay, maybe that's just me. But the point is that God totally understands us. He wants to heal us and make us whole, leading us through hardship and suffering to be conformed to the image of His Son. There's a passage in the New Testament that talks about "with the comfort that He comforts us, we also ought to comfort one another." (Sorry for the paraphrase, but it's practically 2am.) Anyway, to bring the thought around, that whole passage about Messiah is really quite incredible. We have a joke in my family that if the questions are in rapid-fire mode at Bible study, "When in doubt, say 'Jesus!'" It really is true. His blood covers us and gives us access to abundant, sufficient grace.
More on this topic to come.
August 14, 2010
Today's Encouragement
Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart.
Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, neither faints nor is weary. He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. * Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. * You have been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat; for the blast of the terrible ones is as a storm against the wall.
The testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. * Do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise.
Ps. 27:14; Isa. 40-28-29; Isa. 41:10; Isa. 25:4; James 1:3-4; Heb. 10:35-36
Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, neither faints nor is weary. He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength. * Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. * You have been a strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat; for the blast of the terrible ones is as a storm against the wall.
The testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. * Do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise.
Ps. 27:14; Isa. 40-28-29; Isa. 41:10; Isa. 25:4; James 1:3-4; Heb. 10:35-36
August 13, 2010
Copied from Samaritan's Purse
Oxana Prohorova received a shoe box gift from Samaritan’s Purse when she was a teenager in Belarus. She now lives in the United States, and participates in Operation Christmas Child by packing boxes and encouraging others to do the same. She wrote about receiving her shoe box in a recent blog post.
One day my classmates and I were instructed to go to our classroom. The bright and beautifully wrapped shoe boxes, sponsored by the Samaritan's Purse, were all piled in the corner of the classroom.
The joy of receiving a gift from overseas made us all very happy. We could not wait to pick out our own box and see what goodies we received. For the next day, week, and what felt like a month we all asked each other, “What did you get? And what did you get?”
More than any toy or school supply, every single child wanted to receive a letter in his or her shoe box. Unfortunately only 1 or 2 children in my class received a letter and we were all so jealous that we could not write and thank the family for the gift.
I am sure you are all wondering what I have received in my shoe box! Drum roll please …
Well. I hate to disappoint you, but I cannot remember. My mom remembers toys, colorful pens and pencils, but all the contents of my box have been completely wiped out from my memory.
I joke that if I knew that God was going to use me 10 years later to share my testimony, I would have written it down.
I wondered why didn’t God allow me to retain in my memory all the goodies that I received, and one day He revealed to me as I was sharing my testimony with a congregation in a small town in Arkansas.
The reason that I do not remember all the items is because they were not that important.
Now let me explain to you why the toys, candy, and school supplies were not important before you quit reading.
Candy won’t fill up a tummy of a hungry child in Africa for years; toys may comfort a broken heart of a child in Russia for only days. Pens will be lost and broken.
BUT the message of Jesus Christ that the shoe box carries gives the eternal hope that is found in my Savior to a child! God is so much bigger than any shoe box and He uses a simple shoe box to answer some children's prayers and to remind others that He loves them so much.
As I look back in my life and wonder what the shoe box meant to me, the Lord brings me to Joshua 1:5, “ I will never leave you nor forsake you.” The days that I prayed as a child and wondered if God was listening, He gently reminded me through a stranger’s kindness. He was there when I wept and He was there when I rejoiced. He did not leave my side. This makes me want to SHOUT and praise His name!!! I don’t know the family who packed my shoe box, but I sure am thankful for their obedience of giving me the gift.
One day my classmates and I were instructed to go to our classroom. The bright and beautifully wrapped shoe boxes, sponsored by the Samaritan's Purse, were all piled in the corner of the classroom.
The joy of receiving a gift from overseas made us all very happy. We could not wait to pick out our own box and see what goodies we received. For the next day, week, and what felt like a month we all asked each other, “What did you get? And what did you get?”
More than any toy or school supply, every single child wanted to receive a letter in his or her shoe box. Unfortunately only 1 or 2 children in my class received a letter and we were all so jealous that we could not write and thank the family for the gift.
I am sure you are all wondering what I have received in my shoe box! Drum roll please …
Well. I hate to disappoint you, but I cannot remember. My mom remembers toys, colorful pens and pencils, but all the contents of my box have been completely wiped out from my memory.
I joke that if I knew that God was going to use me 10 years later to share my testimony, I would have written it down.
I wondered why didn’t God allow me to retain in my memory all the goodies that I received, and one day He revealed to me as I was sharing my testimony with a congregation in a small town in Arkansas.
The reason that I do not remember all the items is because they were not that important.
Now let me explain to you why the toys, candy, and school supplies were not important before you quit reading.
Candy won’t fill up a tummy of a hungry child in Africa for years; toys may comfort a broken heart of a child in Russia for only days. Pens will be lost and broken.
BUT the message of Jesus Christ that the shoe box carries gives the eternal hope that is found in my Savior to a child! God is so much bigger than any shoe box and He uses a simple shoe box to answer some children's prayers and to remind others that He loves them so much.
As I look back in my life and wonder what the shoe box meant to me, the Lord brings me to Joshua 1:5, “ I will never leave you nor forsake you.” The days that I prayed as a child and wondered if God was listening, He gently reminded me through a stranger’s kindness. He was there when I wept and He was there when I rejoiced. He did not leave my side. This makes me want to SHOUT and praise His name!!! I don’t know the family who packed my shoe box, but I sure am thankful for their obedience of giving me the gift.
August 12, 2010
charity:water and Postscript
charity:water is one of my favorite charities. It has a great story that you should hear/read. Though the organization itself is not explicitly Christian, the founder is motivated by his love for God and love for people.
I used to think that I would marry someone already deeply embroiled in this kind of work and that we would do ministry together. Some of that was a Godly desire to share a life calling devoted to serving "the least of these." Some of it was a foolish desire to fabricate my life path. Honestly, I really do respect and am impressed by people who have devoted their careers to service of the suffering. Yet, as I have drawn closer to the Lord, He has reminded me that the reason I am unusually impressed by these relief and development people is because of their tremendous heart for God and how they have allowed God to use them. It's not because of what they have accomplished or sacrificed. Other people have sacrificed just as much for other causes. Suffering of souls is universal. In the end, the most important and impressive thing anyone can do is give their life wholeheartedly to Christ and pursue Christ. It doesn't matter whether you end up as a dentist, an evangelist, a missionary, a painter, or a nonprofit CEO. It doesn't matter whether you spend your life discipling twelve people (hello?) or have a ministry that brings clean water to twelve million people. The only thing that matters is that you love God unrestrainedly. He will work everything out.
I used to think that I would marry someone already deeply embroiled in this kind of work and that we would do ministry together. Some of that was a Godly desire to share a life calling devoted to serving "the least of these." Some of it was a foolish desire to fabricate my life path. Honestly, I really do respect and am impressed by people who have devoted their careers to service of the suffering. Yet, as I have drawn closer to the Lord, He has reminded me that the reason I am unusually impressed by these relief and development people is because of their tremendous heart for God and how they have allowed God to use them. It's not because of what they have accomplished or sacrificed. Other people have sacrificed just as much for other causes. Suffering of souls is universal. In the end, the most important and impressive thing anyone can do is give their life wholeheartedly to Christ and pursue Christ. It doesn't matter whether you end up as a dentist, an evangelist, a missionary, a painter, or a nonprofit CEO. It doesn't matter whether you spend your life discipling twelve people (hello?) or have a ministry that brings clean water to twelve million people. The only thing that matters is that you love God unrestrainedly. He will work everything out.
Eradication of Guinea Worms
In addition to sharing what God is teaching me, I also plan to start sharing more on this blog about international relief and development topics. A few months ago I read an incredible book called Half the Sky about gender inequality worldwide. It is not a man-bashing book! Rather, it discusses the humanitarian crisis of devaluing women and the forms that takes (human trafficking, lack of education, gender based violence, etc.). The book covered many topics on international relief and development with which I was unfamiliar. Again, I highly recommend it. The authors have a different faith and political perspective than I do, but they are well researched and well traveled and document their sources in extensive footnotes. The authors are actually the first couple to win a Pulitzer for their work, an earlier collaboration about China. Anyway, here is an article written by Nicholas Kristof about the eradication of guinea worms. It's nice to have some good news!
August 11, 2010
Valjean v. Javert
Last Friday on the drive up to San Jose, I had the pleasure of listening to the London Cast Recording of Les Miserables. I had noticed in the past that "What I Have I Done" or Jean Valjean's soliloquy after leaving the priest's house forgiven and blessed was set to the same score as "Javert's Suicide." However, not until this listening did I fully realize that the composer was contrasting the two men's reactions to unrequested mercy. Both men had received mercy from someone they had wronged.
Jean Valjean was to be sentenced to be returned to jail for life had the priest not forgiven him for stealing and covered for him. To top it off, the priest told him to keep the stolen articles and then added more, claiming Jean Valjean for God! This was grace in addition to mercy. Jean Valjean, a victim of the unjust penal system that robbed him of sixteen years, wrestled with this likewise unjust act and decided to give his life to God. He accepted mercy, and the acceptance turned him to good.
Javert spent his life adhering to a perverted justice system. Strictly following the rules, which were technically just because they were the law, allowed him to think he controlled his life. When Jean Valjean freed him from an otherwise certain death penalty for spying, Javert could not accept this mercy. He had pursued Jean Valjean for years and, furthermore, perceived death as a just punishment for spying. Now, it's interesting that Jean Valjean did not necessarily think that he was giving Javert mercy. I think he saw it more as grace as Javert was "just doing his job.Javert, however, could not accept mercy from a "criminal." His pride and system of control could not psychologically or spiritually accept it. Thus, he committed suicide in order to satisfy his own rules. So fascinating! And set to the same music. The lyrics are below.
Valjean's Soliloquy
What have I done?
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?
Become a thief in the night
Become a dog on the run
And have I fallen so far
And is the hour so late
That nothing remains but the cry of my hate,
The cries in the dark that nobody hears,
Here where I stand at the turning of the years?
If there's another way to go
I missed it twenty long years ago
My life was a war that could never be won
They gave me a number and murdered Valjean
When they chained me and left me for dead
Just for stealing a mouthful of bread
Yet why did I allow that man
To touch my soul and teach me love?
He treated me like any other
He gave me his trust
He called me brother
My life he claims for God above
Can such things be?
For I had come to hate this world
This world which had always hated me
Take an eye for an eye!
Turn your heart into stone!
This is all I have lived for!
This is all I have known!
One word from him and I'd be back
Beneath the lash, upon the rack
Instead he offers me my freedom,
I feel my shame inside me like a knife
He told me that I have a soul,
How does he know?
What spirit came to move my life?
Is there another way to go?
I am reaching, but I fall
And the night is closing in
And I stare into the void
To the whirlpool of my sin
I'll escape now from the world
From the world of Jean Valjean
Jean Valjean is nothing now
Another story must begin!
Javert's Suicide
Who is this man?
What sort of devil is he
To have me caught in a trap
And chose to let me go free?
It was his hour at last
To put a seal on my fate
Wipe out the past
And wash me clean off the slate!
All it would take was a flick of his knife.
Vengeance was his and he gave me back my life!
Damned if I'll live in the debt of thief
Damned if I'll yield at the end of the chase
I am the law and the law is not mocked
I'll spit his pity right back in his face
There is nothing on Earth that we share
It is either Valjean or Javert!
How can I now allow this man
To hold dominion over me?
This desperate man that I have hunted
He gave me my life. He gave me freedom.
I should have parished by his hand
It was his right
It was my right to die as well
Instead I live.. but live in hell
And my thoughts fly apart
Can this man be believed?
Shall his sins be forgiven?
Shall his crimes be reprieved?
And must I now begin to doubt
Who never doubted all these years?
My heart is stone and still it trembles
The world I have known is lost in shadow
Is he from heaven or from hell?
And does he know
That granting me my life today
This man has killed me, even so?
I am reaching but I fall
And the stars are black and cold
As I stare into the void
Of a world that cannot hold
I'll escape now from that world
From the world of Jean Valjean
There is nowhere I can turn
There is no way to go on
Jean Valjean was to be sentenced to be returned to jail for life had the priest not forgiven him for stealing and covered for him. To top it off, the priest told him to keep the stolen articles and then added more, claiming Jean Valjean for God! This was grace in addition to mercy. Jean Valjean, a victim of the unjust penal system that robbed him of sixteen years, wrestled with this likewise unjust act and decided to give his life to God. He accepted mercy, and the acceptance turned him to good.
Javert spent his life adhering to a perverted justice system. Strictly following the rules, which were technically just because they were the law, allowed him to think he controlled his life. When Jean Valjean freed him from an otherwise certain death penalty for spying, Javert could not accept this mercy. He had pursued Jean Valjean for years and, furthermore, perceived death as a just punishment for spying. Now, it's interesting that Jean Valjean did not necessarily think that he was giving Javert mercy. I think he saw it more as grace as Javert was "just doing his job.Javert, however, could not accept mercy from a "criminal." His pride and system of control could not psychologically or spiritually accept it. Thus, he committed suicide in order to satisfy his own rules. So fascinating! And set to the same music. The lyrics are below.
Valjean's Soliloquy
What have I done?
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?
Become a thief in the night
Become a dog on the run
And have I fallen so far
And is the hour so late
That nothing remains but the cry of my hate,
The cries in the dark that nobody hears,
Here where I stand at the turning of the years?
If there's another way to go
I missed it twenty long years ago
My life was a war that could never be won
They gave me a number and murdered Valjean
When they chained me and left me for dead
Just for stealing a mouthful of bread
Yet why did I allow that man
To touch my soul and teach me love?
He treated me like any other
He gave me his trust
He called me brother
My life he claims for God above
Can such things be?
For I had come to hate this world
This world which had always hated me
Take an eye for an eye!
Turn your heart into stone!
This is all I have lived for!
This is all I have known!
One word from him and I'd be back
Beneath the lash, upon the rack
Instead he offers me my freedom,
I feel my shame inside me like a knife
He told me that I have a soul,
How does he know?
What spirit came to move my life?
Is there another way to go?
I am reaching, but I fall
And the night is closing in
And I stare into the void
To the whirlpool of my sin
I'll escape now from the world
From the world of Jean Valjean
Jean Valjean is nothing now
Another story must begin!
Javert's Suicide
Who is this man?
What sort of devil is he
To have me caught in a trap
And chose to let me go free?
It was his hour at last
To put a seal on my fate
Wipe out the past
And wash me clean off the slate!
All it would take was a flick of his knife.
Vengeance was his and he gave me back my life!
Damned if I'll live in the debt of thief
Damned if I'll yield at the end of the chase
I am the law and the law is not mocked
I'll spit his pity right back in his face
There is nothing on Earth that we share
It is either Valjean or Javert!
How can I now allow this man
To hold dominion over me?
This desperate man that I have hunted
He gave me my life. He gave me freedom.
I should have parished by his hand
It was his right
It was my right to die as well
Instead I live.. but live in hell
And my thoughts fly apart
Can this man be believed?
Shall his sins be forgiven?
Shall his crimes be reprieved?
And must I now begin to doubt
Who never doubted all these years?
My heart is stone and still it trembles
The world I have known is lost in shadow
Is he from heaven or from hell?
And does he know
That granting me my life today
This man has killed me, even so?
I am reaching but I fall
And the stars are black and cold
As I stare into the void
Of a world that cannot hold
I'll escape now from that world
From the world of Jean Valjean
There is nowhere I can turn
There is no way to go on
August 10, 2010
Faith
For the past few weeks I have thought often of faith, of having faith in what God is speaking to you. I have thought about Biblical stories and of Bob Pierce and his description of "God room." I have thought of my own life and the times God has spoken to me. Faith involves expectation--"the evidence of things not seen." There are certainly times in my life when I have had trust and not faith because I did not know what God was doing! I did not have any expectation except that He was working to my good. I guess you could call that a general faith, but I'm not here to necessarily argue the distinction. My thoughts are only half formulated on this, but God is teaching me as we go along. I'm the type of person who would prefer to read the instruction manual first instead of "learning by doing." It's good for me to be stretched.
Anyway, I have been contemplating whether or not faith requires you being assured of what God wants. Perhaps that assurance takes faith too? Many times in the Bible God divinely appeared or sent messengers to people, and then it required faith for them to believe the message. Mary believing in a virgin pregnancy after an angelic visitation or, even more so, Joseph believing it after an angelic dream are examples of this. They had external confirmations, but what about people who do not? I think of what Jesus said to Thomas, along the lines of "You have believed because you have seen. Blessed are those who have believed without seeing." It's easier to believe something when we have outside confirmation, isn't it? And I think God understands this and is gracious to us in this. That is probably one of the reasons He gave us prophecy as an encouragement to the body. We are supposed to encourage one another in what God is telling us.
Sometimes it frightens me how much I question if God is speaking to me or my mind is making things up. When I am questioning, either I am not in close enough relationship with God that I recognize His voice or I am having doubts as to what He is telling me and am rationalizing them. I read the Bible and realize that I am not the only one who does this, but it is not commendable. I skimmed Hebrews 11 this morning and saw where I had underlined in the heroes of the faith section: "And what more shall I say? For the time would fail me to tell of Gideon and Barak and Samson and Jephthah, also of David and Samuel and the prophets: who through faith subdued kingdoms, worked righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, became valiant in battle, turned to flight the armies of their enemies." It's good to remember that God does not expect us to be strong apart from Him.
When you read that chapter, you may be surprised at the acts for which people were commended for their faith. For instance, Abel is commended for offering to God a more excellent sacrifice. Also, "By faith the walls of Jericho fell down after they were encircled for seven days."
Well, the Angel of the Lord appeared to Joshua, right? Sometimes I think I could believe anything if I had a supernatural message. Then I recall that I have the Holy Spirit speaking truth inside of me. Yes, Abraham had divine visitors who spoke of his son to come, but he also obeyed the voice of the Lord many times without (as far as we know) external confirmation. He left his homeland and also offered up his only son. Even though God seemed to be contradicting Himself (i.e. miraculously giving Abraham a son and then telling him to kill that son), Abraham still obeyed God and concluded that God was able to raise up his son from the dead. This astounds me. I think if God told me to kill my son, I would conclude that I was suffering from hallucinations and heatstroke and hysteria.
You know, I definitely do not understand all of God's ways. He just does not make sense to me. And that's beyond okay. He shouldn't make sense to me. He's beyond comprehension. There are many mysteries about Him and in Him. Yet, He tells me everything I need to know. Some things are really quite simple that I make overcomplicated, such as "Is it me or is it you, Lord?" And some things that I make simple are really quite unfathomable, such as grace.
Bottom line is that it takes a humble relationship to hear from the Lord and to have faith in what He is speaking. I've blogged recently about the difference between hope and faith and about God increasing our measure or gift of faith. At times it is hard to believe what God is telling you, especially if everyone else thinks you're nuts. (Look at Noah.) The solution is not to analyze the message (which I tend to do) but rather to press in closer to God, walking with God. He'll work it out. It's all going to be okay. Hard and painful perhaps, but okay. And that is something that should bring us indescribable joy.
Anyway, I have been contemplating whether or not faith requires you being assured of what God wants. Perhaps that assurance takes faith too? Many times in the Bible God divinely appeared or sent messengers to people, and then it required faith for them to believe the message. Mary believing in a virgin pregnancy after an angelic visitation or, even more so, Joseph believing it after an angelic dream are examples of this. They had external confirmations, but what about people who do not? I think of what Jesus said to Thomas, along the lines of "You have believed because you have seen. Blessed are those who have believed without seeing." It's easier to believe something when we have outside confirmation, isn't it? And I think God understands this and is gracious to us in this. That is probably one of the reasons He gave us prophecy as an encouragement to the body. We are supposed to encourage one another in what God is telling us.
Sometimes it frightens me how much I question if God is speaking to me or my mind is making things up. When I am questioning, either I am not in close enough relationship with God that I recognize His voice or I am having doubts as to what He is telling me and am rationalizing them. I read the Bible and realize that I am not the only one who does this, but it is not commendable. I skimmed Hebrews 11 this morning and saw where I had underlined in the heroes of the faith section: "And what more shall I say? For the time would fail me to tell of Gideon and Barak and Samson and Jephthah, also of David and Samuel and the prophets: who through faith subdued kingdoms, worked righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, became valiant in battle, turned to flight the armies of their enemies." It's good to remember that God does not expect us to be strong apart from Him.
When you read that chapter, you may be surprised at the acts for which people were commended for their faith. For instance, Abel is commended for offering to God a more excellent sacrifice. Also, "By faith the walls of Jericho fell down after they were encircled for seven days."
Well, the Angel of the Lord appeared to Joshua, right? Sometimes I think I could believe anything if I had a supernatural message. Then I recall that I have the Holy Spirit speaking truth inside of me. Yes, Abraham had divine visitors who spoke of his son to come, but he also obeyed the voice of the Lord many times without (as far as we know) external confirmation. He left his homeland and also offered up his only son. Even though God seemed to be contradicting Himself (i.e. miraculously giving Abraham a son and then telling him to kill that son), Abraham still obeyed God and concluded that God was able to raise up his son from the dead. This astounds me. I think if God told me to kill my son, I would conclude that I was suffering from hallucinations and heatstroke and hysteria.
You know, I definitely do not understand all of God's ways. He just does not make sense to me. And that's beyond okay. He shouldn't make sense to me. He's beyond comprehension. There are many mysteries about Him and in Him. Yet, He tells me everything I need to know. Some things are really quite simple that I make overcomplicated, such as "Is it me or is it you, Lord?" And some things that I make simple are really quite unfathomable, such as grace.
Bottom line is that it takes a humble relationship to hear from the Lord and to have faith in what He is speaking. I've blogged recently about the difference between hope and faith and about God increasing our measure or gift of faith. At times it is hard to believe what God is telling you, especially if everyone else thinks you're nuts. (Look at Noah.) The solution is not to analyze the message (which I tend to do) but rather to press in closer to God, walking with God. He'll work it out. It's all going to be okay. Hard and painful perhaps, but okay. And that is something that should bring us indescribable joy.
August 8, 2010
Strengths for Stalkers
As part of a lounging effort to recover from a road trip and incredibly emotional weekend that culminated with my first speeding ticket, I just updated my Facebook bio. I know, I know -- not terribly interesting or important. However, I kept the comments brief and directed stalkers to read my blog, so today's post is for them (and the faithful four readers).
Guess what I finally did on July 27, 2010 that has been on my "Someday" list for two years?
...
...
...
Strengthfinders!
(What's the point of those little dots? You just skip right past them. They're more decorative than suspenseful.)
CONNECT gave the exiting VISTAs a free copy of the personality test book with the code intact, so I discovered that my top five themes or strengths are:
Belief
Responsibility
Input
Individualization
Strategic
People who are especially talented in the Belief theme have certain core values that are
unchanging. Out of these values emerges a defined purpose for their life.
People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.
People who are especially talented in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often
they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.
People who are especially talented in the Individualization theme are intrigued with the
unique qualities of each person. They have a gift for figuring out how people who are
different can work together productively.
People who are especially talented in the Strategic theme create alternative ways to proceed. Faced with any given scenario, they can quickly spot the relevant patterns and issues.
After you take the test, Strengthfinders creates a report with some specifics about each of your top few strengths. I found the wording of these sections amusing as they directly correlated to how strongly I scored myself. For example, if I tended to be more moderate or occasional on a theme, the description was laden with terms such as "may", "could be", "very likely", "perhaps", etc. I'll share the belief specifics because they resonated most strongly and because I think this will give a good impression of what to expect from the test should you take it.
It’s very likely that you employ your passion for reading to collect lots of good ideas for
resolving issues, fixing mistakes, or overcoming obstacles. The act of reading allows you to
generate options for dealing with all sorts of predicaments — that is, difficult, perplexing, or
trying situations. Driven by your talents, you are a wordsmith — that is, a person who works
with words. With ease, you collect hard-to-understand terms and their definitions. Whether
you can use these immediately or months later is of no concern. You probably realize your
sophisticated vocabulary is an “open sesame” — that is, words that unfailingly bring about a
desired end. You are likely to speak or write in such a manner that the condition of
humankind improves in a meaningful way. Instinctively, you have faith in your convictions
about life. You contend they are well-founded and enduring. You value your freedom and
independence. This explains why you detest being ordered around by someone. You want to
be the person in charge. Chances are good that you have no doubts about being linked in
some way with everything in the universe. This includes all creation and all humankind. By
nature, you are naturally inclined to make sacrifices that benefit someone else. You enjoy
being generous with your time, knowledge, skills, experiences, resources, or possessions.
Though I enjoyed taking the test, I did not learn too many new insights about myself, and the Myers-Briggs is still my favorite. Granted, I did take the test when I was down in the proverbial dumps, so my opinion is probably skewed. In a few months I may re-read my results and be astounded. I should add that I'm pretty sure the themes are listed in the order of their significance in your life. They're not numbered, as they could change. I did not find the results inaccurate, but I was surprised that input and strategic landed there rather than other strengths (such as communication) on which I tend to rely.
Reader, you may be shaking your head and thinking, "Katie, you don't know everything! Maybe your input strength really is stronger and has more potential than your communication strength. Maybe after all these personality tests and analyzing sessions you still don't know your own strengths. Hah!" Could be! With gratefulness, in my weakness, He is made strong.
Guess what I finally did on July 27, 2010 that has been on my "Someday" list for two years?
...
...
...
Strengthfinders!
(What's the point of those little dots? You just skip right past them. They're more decorative than suspenseful.)
CONNECT gave the exiting VISTAs a free copy of the personality test book with the code intact, so I discovered that my top five themes or strengths are:
Belief
Responsibility
Input
Individualization
Strategic
People who are especially talented in the Belief theme have certain core values that are
unchanging. Out of these values emerges a defined purpose for their life.
People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.
People who are especially talented in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often
they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.
People who are especially talented in the Individualization theme are intrigued with the
unique qualities of each person. They have a gift for figuring out how people who are
different can work together productively.
People who are especially talented in the Strategic theme create alternative ways to proceed. Faced with any given scenario, they can quickly spot the relevant patterns and issues.
After you take the test, Strengthfinders creates a report with some specifics about each of your top few strengths. I found the wording of these sections amusing as they directly correlated to how strongly I scored myself. For example, if I tended to be more moderate or occasional on a theme, the description was laden with terms such as "may", "could be", "very likely", "perhaps", etc. I'll share the belief specifics because they resonated most strongly and because I think this will give a good impression of what to expect from the test should you take it.
It’s very likely that you employ your passion for reading to collect lots of good ideas for
resolving issues, fixing mistakes, or overcoming obstacles. The act of reading allows you to
generate options for dealing with all sorts of predicaments — that is, difficult, perplexing, or
trying situations. Driven by your talents, you are a wordsmith — that is, a person who works
with words. With ease, you collect hard-to-understand terms and their definitions. Whether
you can use these immediately or months later is of no concern. You probably realize your
sophisticated vocabulary is an “open sesame” — that is, words that unfailingly bring about a
desired end. You are likely to speak or write in such a manner that the condition of
humankind improves in a meaningful way. Instinctively, you have faith in your convictions
about life. You contend they are well-founded and enduring. You value your freedom and
independence. This explains why you detest being ordered around by someone. You want to
be the person in charge. Chances are good that you have no doubts about being linked in
some way with everything in the universe. This includes all creation and all humankind. By
nature, you are naturally inclined to make sacrifices that benefit someone else. You enjoy
being generous with your time, knowledge, skills, experiences, resources, or possessions.
Though I enjoyed taking the test, I did not learn too many new insights about myself, and the Myers-Briggs is still my favorite. Granted, I did take the test when I was down in the proverbial dumps, so my opinion is probably skewed. In a few months I may re-read my results and be astounded. I should add that I'm pretty sure the themes are listed in the order of their significance in your life. They're not numbered, as they could change. I did not find the results inaccurate, but I was surprised that input and strategic landed there rather than other strengths (such as communication) on which I tend to rely.
Reader, you may be shaking your head and thinking, "Katie, you don't know everything! Maybe your input strength really is stronger and has more potential than your communication strength. Maybe after all these personality tests and analyzing sessions you still don't know your own strengths. Hah!" Could be! With gratefulness, in my weakness, He is made strong.
August 4, 2010
Storge, Eros, Philos, Agape
I’m packing up my apartment to leave
I know I am not alone in wishing that English had more words to express “love.” The Greeks had three words for different types (family, friends, and romantic) and had to add a fourth after God sent His Son. (It would be cool to read the New Testament in Greek and realize the different types of love it mentions.) We’ve watered down the word until the meaning is confused. We add clarifying expressions, but it is still hard to know what people mean. Then you have different levels of love. How can it be that a couple who has been married for 60 years like my grandparents uses the same phrase as a couple who has been together 60 months or even 60 days? Yet, there is also something beautiful in that continuity, i.e. I still love you but more than ever.
What about when you feel different types of love for the same person? How do you differentiate those with one word? I guess that is why relationships are so important. There is an element of trust and understanding required to bridge gaps of meaning. We do not have to say, “I storge you, I eros you, and I agape you.” Still, sometimes I think it would be helpful as well as meaningful. Plus, people express love in different ways, and I mean verbally as well as the love languages.
This is a subject much on my mind. May God teach all of us to love well.
Also, today driving back from
August 3, 2010
Creating
Last night as I was on my way to check the mail, I got to thinking about nature and then creation. If God is immutable, then He is still creating. What is He creating today that is on the scope of the original creation? I think the answer is people. Then I was wondering, what will He create during eternity? I'm not sure, but I am looking forward to it. We will also be able to create things, since we are made in God's image.
I hope I get to travel on the new heaven and the new earth. Sometimes I get a little sad that I will not be able to see as much of this earth that I would like or have as much time with people as I wish or read all of the beautiful waiting words. I need to remember that this world is a shadow.
A shadow that require gas money. I'm off to fill out my mileage form.
I hope I get to travel on the new heaven and the new earth. Sometimes I get a little sad that I will not be able to see as much of this earth that I would like or have as much time with people as I wish or read all of the beautiful waiting words. I need to remember that this world is a shadow.
A shadow that require gas money. I'm off to fill out my mileage form.
August 2, 2010
Be Still, My Soul
I only knew the first two verses to this and am happy to discover the rest. There is definitely power in speaking truth, which is one reason I like hymns. I am glad that we have the authority of Christ to speak to our souls. BTW, one of my personal beliefs is that many people are going to be caught off guard one day when they stand before God and He mentions all of the promises and praises they sang without conviction or surrender. I surely am guilty of this at times, just singing away without truly remembering the One whom I am praising.
Be Still, My Soul
Be Still, My Soul
1. Be still, my soul:
the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently
the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God
to order and provide;
In every change,
He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul:
thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways
leads to a joyful end.
2. Be still, my soul:
thy God doth undertake
To guide the future,
as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence
let nothing shake;
All now mysterious
shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul:
the waves and winds
still know His voice
Who ruled them
while He dwelt below.
3. Be still, my soul:
when dearest friends depart,
And all is darkened
in the vale of tears,
Then shalt thou better know
His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe
thy sorrow and thy fears.
Be still, my soul:
thy Jesus can repay
From His own fullness
all He takes away.
4. Be still, my soul:
the hour is hastening on
When we shall be
forever with the Lord.
When disappointment,
grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot,
love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul:
when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed
we shall meet at last.
5. Be still, my soul:
begin the song of praise
On earth, believing,
to thy Lord on high;
Acknowledge Him
in all thy works and ways,
So shall He view
thee with a well-pleased eye.
Be still, my soul:
the Sun of life divine
Through passing clouds
shall but more brightly shine.
Public Domain
August 1, 2010
If You Want Me To
Previously, I have mentioned Ginny Owens as being, to my knowledge, one of our most profound and encouraging Christian artists. One of my pen pals in junior high sent me her album "I Am," and I return to her music when I need to be reminded of God's truths. Ginny is blind and single. When she sings of surrender, it comes from deep personal experience. One of her songs that has been ministering to me over the past three months is "If You Want Me To." I found this version of her performing it. To be honest, I much prefer the audio recording, but it is poignant to watch.
The American Christian culture seems to think there is something wrong with hardship. If life is not easy, then something is wrong! God is supposed to come through for us, right? The truth is, hardship and suffering drive us to God. They conform us to Jesus (Philippians 3). Yes, God is our provider, defender, and advocate. He is always with us. Yet, as Ginny puts it: "But You never said it would be easy. You only said we'd never go alone." As Christians, we are supposed to endure hardships and still run the race well.
A question with which I still struggle is why God allows such a magnitude of suffering in the world. Furthermore, it seems that oftentimes it is the countries that do not know Him that suffer most. It seems unjust that people should have horrible lives and eternal deaths. However, Acts 17 has been a great comfort to me in this regard. It talks about how God has "preappointed [our] times and the boundaries of [our] dwellings in the hopes that [we] might grope for Him and find Him." (Katie paraphrase) It occurred to me the other day that in allowing vast amounts of suffering, God may be giving these people the impetus to reach out to Him. Otherwise, people tend to wait until they reach the end of their own strength before they are interested in God.
If You Want Me To
The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to
Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to
It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone
ya oh oh no
So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley If You want me to
The American Christian culture seems to think there is something wrong with hardship. If life is not easy, then something is wrong! God is supposed to come through for us, right? The truth is, hardship and suffering drive us to God. They conform us to Jesus (Philippians 3). Yes, God is our provider, defender, and advocate. He is always with us. Yet, as Ginny puts it: "But You never said it would be easy. You only said we'd never go alone." As Christians, we are supposed to endure hardships and still run the race well.
A question with which I still struggle is why God allows such a magnitude of suffering in the world. Furthermore, it seems that oftentimes it is the countries that do not know Him that suffer most. It seems unjust that people should have horrible lives and eternal deaths. However, Acts 17 has been a great comfort to me in this regard. It talks about how God has "preappointed [our] times and the boundaries of [our] dwellings in the hopes that [we] might grope for Him and find Him." (Katie paraphrase) It occurred to me the other day that in allowing vast amounts of suffering, God may be giving these people the impetus to reach out to Him. Otherwise, people tend to wait until they reach the end of their own strength before they are interested in God.
If You Want Me To
The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to
Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to
It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone
ya oh oh no
So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley If You want me to
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